As Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur approach, we frequently hear the words
used in reference to the judgement that takes place during these days.

This phrase is adapted from a mishnah in Pirkei Avos (4:1) where advises us to reflect and think about the judgement and reckoning that we are destined to give before Hashem, .

The sequence of these words seems to be quite odd. One would assume that should precede , since refers to the account of one's mitzvos and sins while is the judgement. When one is called to court, he first presents his case, the and then the judge renders his decision, his . Why then do we find the order to be ? Furthermore, why does state that we will give a before Hashem, when it is Hashem who will render the upon us?

The Vilna Gaon Zt"l offers the following interpretation of these words and explains their order as well. refers to the number of sins that were transgressed, the mitzvos that were observed, the manner in which they were performed, how much energy and effort were expended in their fulfilment. on the other hand, does not focus on what was done, rather on what could have been done, but was not. The time I wasted, the precious moments of life that I longed for and prayed for on last Rosh Hashanah with such fervor, that I simply squandered in pursuit of futility., at first we face our for what we did, and then the follows on what we could have and should have accomplished with the time and talents granted to us.

The Vilna Gaon in his teaches, immediately prior to one's death three angels come to meet him. One angel calculates the sins that he amassed during his lifetime. The second is the angel that taught him Torah prior to his birth, who comes to investigate if he studied during his life that Torah which he had been taught to him by the angel. And the third angel counts the minutes that the deceased spent in this world and then makes a of what was done with that time.

The makes a fascinating comment in reference to the moment of death. Each person, he said, dies from shock. We are shown who we are, and then we are shown who we could have been. The shock of seeing what I could have accomplished had I been more sincere and diligent in my lifetime is what kills a person.

The Rebbe Reb Zusia Zt"l (brother of the ) said about himself: "When I will face the heavenly court after my demise, I am not afraid that they are going to ask me, Why were you not Moshe Rabeinu, Rebbe Akiva, the Rambam? I have no such fear for I am sure that they will not ask me these questions. However, I am afraid that I will be asked, Why weren't you Zusia, the Zusia that you could have been, the Zusia that we had planned for you to be through the talents, abilities, time and opportunities that were granted to you. That is what scares me,"said Rebbe Zusia.

As we ask for life in the coming weeks, we must remember that we are responsible for the time granted to us and ultimately, we will have to give a for each moment that we lived. If we bear this in mind, our time will no doubt be spent more productively and the gift of life that Hashem shall hopefully grant us will be even more appreciated.

This year that is coming to an end has been a most difficult one for Klal Yisroel and especially for Eretz Yisroel. May our Tefilos ascend before the Heavenly Court during the Days of Judgement, together with the of our resolutions to improve upon our and we shall merit a year of .

On behalf of Rebetzin Batsheva Felder, myself and my Rebetzin, I would like to express best wishes to all our members for a Happy, Healthy and Prosperous New Year.